i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
