Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
