Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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