She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Well I just put wine in my tea
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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