Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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