I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
