he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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