she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
