How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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