It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
