Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
