PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
