i just had sex bonerless
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
