So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
