This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
