help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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