I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
