I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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