i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
We have started to decorate penises.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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