My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
as a side note pls kill me
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
