Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
