we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
