hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
