It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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