Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
