Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
