I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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