If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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