if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
