i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
