its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
