Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
