can u get pink eye on your cock?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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