Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
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