Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize
