My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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