we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
