You can't special order awesome
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
