She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
