As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
