i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
You're a waste of cheezeits
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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