i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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