we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Randomize
