Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
