oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
