Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
we should paint friendship bongs
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
