Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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