Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Houston, we have a blender
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
