We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
