my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Screwed.edu
My hand turned me down
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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