belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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